it is too beautiful. indescribable. she is in Mekah Al Mukarramah with her 5 children. the Umrah. spiritual. pure happiness.
the blazing noon sun is never a hindrance. it doesn't feel hot doing the Tawaf amongst thousands. the white marble flooring seems cool. the Kaabah ever tranquil. love flows. peace reigns.
the Saei between Safa and Marwah.
the Hajar Aswad. the Multazam. the Hijir Ismail.Maqam Ibrahim. the golden pancor.
the unearthly sweetness of the Zam Zam.
nights and days blend. joy and tears. and love. and longing.
Friday, 28 September 2012
lempeng kelapa
this morning she suddenly thought of lempeng kelapa. coconut pancake. food for the soul. a hearty breakfast for village folks eaten piping hot on cold cold mornings.
she mixed fresh coconut with flour. added a pinch of sugar and salt. made into a thick dough with water. cooked with just a teeny bit of oil.
tasted so good. with steaming hot sugarless tea.
as the monsoon poured outside. and kiko played with the mischievous koko.
she mixed fresh coconut with flour. added a pinch of sugar and salt. made into a thick dough with water. cooked with just a teeny bit of oil.
tasted so good. with steaming hot sugarless tea.
as the monsoon poured outside. and kiko played with the mischievous koko.
food of her childhood
oftentimes she'd crave for the food of her childhood. traditional Malay kuehs and delicacies.
her grandma was a terrific cook. so was her mum. tepung talam, kueh lompang, seri muka (fragrant brown top), putu kacang, putu pulut, pulut kacau/wajik, dodol, bahulu, kueh sepit, bahulu betawi (steamed), kueh lapis, the different types of lempeng (banana, coconut, plain), lepat manis/ liat, lepat pisang, the different types of bengkang..... they never bought breakfast in those days.
early in the morning after subuh prayers her grandma would start cooking the kuehs. home made with love, the kuehs tasted divine. incomparable.
weeks before hari raya, her mum and grandma would be busy making dodol, wajik, bahulu, kueh sepit etc. they would use firewood to cook these. they'd prepare lemang, ketupat pulut to be eaten with thick beef curry. pure heaven.
then the everyday food ...her grandma's pajeri nenas, fish curry, prawn, egg sambal, beef kurma, kerabu kadok, ikan masak cuka, pais ikan, acar buah, ayam goreng jintan, turmeric squids, the different types of bubur... she loved them all. sweet sour bawal, fish head soup, butter cake, samperit cooked by her mum remained her all time favourites. even the cendol was home made! and the koay teow too. her mum also made savoury keropok ubi kayu, crunchy and yummy. her mum used to teach cooking to the villagers.
her grandma had this talent no one else had then - making or creating bunga gula or sugar flower. not the modern fondant kind. but sugar boiled and then pulled/stretched and folded while hot by hand! her grandma and mum would form petals, leaves, ducks, birds or hens from this concoction. sometimes her brother and she helped too. (hmmm... now she realised that as a family they were all artistic, talented with their hands!)
the end result was a huge lotus flower with a diameter of about 12 - 15 inches. or huge ducks. doves, hens. leaves. sometimes in pink. these were commisioned by people from as far away as the capital city for hantaran.
her grandma gained fame throughout the country through the bunga gula!
her grandma was a terrific cook. so was her mum. tepung talam, kueh lompang, seri muka (fragrant brown top), putu kacang, putu pulut, pulut kacau/wajik, dodol, bahulu, kueh sepit, bahulu betawi (steamed), kueh lapis, the different types of lempeng (banana, coconut, plain), lepat manis/ liat, lepat pisang, the different types of bengkang..... they never bought breakfast in those days.
early in the morning after subuh prayers her grandma would start cooking the kuehs. home made with love, the kuehs tasted divine. incomparable.
weeks before hari raya, her mum and grandma would be busy making dodol, wajik, bahulu, kueh sepit etc. they would use firewood to cook these. they'd prepare lemang, ketupat pulut to be eaten with thick beef curry. pure heaven.
then the everyday food ...her grandma's pajeri nenas, fish curry, prawn, egg sambal, beef kurma, kerabu kadok, ikan masak cuka, pais ikan, acar buah, ayam goreng jintan, turmeric squids, the different types of bubur... she loved them all. sweet sour bawal, fish head soup, butter cake, samperit cooked by her mum remained her all time favourites. even the cendol was home made! and the koay teow too. her mum also made savoury keropok ubi kayu, crunchy and yummy. her mum used to teach cooking to the villagers.
her grandma had this talent no one else had then - making or creating bunga gula or sugar flower. not the modern fondant kind. but sugar boiled and then pulled/stretched and folded while hot by hand! her grandma and mum would form petals, leaves, ducks, birds or hens from this concoction. sometimes her brother and she helped too. (hmmm... now she realised that as a family they were all artistic, talented with their hands!)
the end result was a huge lotus flower with a diameter of about 12 - 15 inches. or huge ducks. doves, hens. leaves. sometimes in pink. these were commisioned by people from as far away as the capital city for hantaran.
her grandma gained fame throughout the country through the bunga gula!
train journey
the 60's. sometimes she'd go to her parents during the school holidays. at the southern part of the peninsula. her younger sister still a toddler. her mum loved reading. her father would buy books for her mum. she'd read while cooking. and at night.
when the new school term was about to start, her mum and sister would travel with her back to her grandpa's house up north. they took the night train from the capital city. third class. the green seats were hard. the coaches were always packed.
the train was the main mode of transport then.
her mum would pack a large tiffin carrier of food. rice. liver fried in tumeric. hard boiled eggs. it was like a picnic.
there would be makeshift cradles out of kain pelikat hung by strings to the ceiling of the coaches. mothers crooned their babies to sleep in these. most times there would be babies crying. soldiers were everywhere in their green uniforms. laughing. happy. people chatted. exchanged stories. friendships were formed.
her mum would share the food with the young soldiers. she always brought more than enough.
the train stopped at most of the stations. hawkers would come up to the windows with food. some even got on the train. it was fun. the food sold was delicious too.
there was so much colour. so much to look at. to listen to. besides the noise of the train.
the 11 hour journey did not seem long. soon the station by the sea appeared out of the morning mist.
they then took the ferry to the island state. then took the yellow bus to the hamlet on the hillslope. back to the lovely family house in the shades of so many fruit trees.
when the new school term was about to start, her mum and sister would travel with her back to her grandpa's house up north. they took the night train from the capital city. third class. the green seats were hard. the coaches were always packed.
the train was the main mode of transport then.
her mum would pack a large tiffin carrier of food. rice. liver fried in tumeric. hard boiled eggs. it was like a picnic.
there would be makeshift cradles out of kain pelikat hung by strings to the ceiling of the coaches. mothers crooned their babies to sleep in these. most times there would be babies crying. soldiers were everywhere in their green uniforms. laughing. happy. people chatted. exchanged stories. friendships were formed.
her mum would share the food with the young soldiers. she always brought more than enough.
the train stopped at most of the stations. hawkers would come up to the windows with food. some even got on the train. it was fun. the food sold was delicious too.
there was so much colour. so much to look at. to listen to. besides the noise of the train.
the 11 hour journey did not seem long. soon the station by the sea appeared out of the morning mist.
they then took the ferry to the island state. then took the yellow bus to the hamlet on the hillslope. back to the lovely family house in the shades of so many fruit trees.
Thursday, 27 September 2012
the rhythm of the rain
how she loves
listening to the falling rain
the rhythm
the sweetness
the purity
the sigh of a wind from
the hills
rushing through the casuarinas
listening to the falling rain
the rhythm
the sweetness
the purity
the sigh of a wind from
the hills
rushing through the casuarinas
Tuesday, 25 September 2012
those sleepless nights
the nights before presentation or portfolio checking.
sleepless. sometimes without food too. however did they manage?
they did not have archi software then. they had drawing boards. t-squares. set squares. and those very expensive technical drawing pens which often broke down after extensive use.
they had their personal space in the studios where some did their work 24 hours a day, especially the boys. especially near project handing up time.
all of them would look groggy, unkempt, red-eyed. did they even bathe?
her roomates were not from her faculty. more often than not they would fail to understand the chaos she created in the room when completing her design assignments.
she smiles when thinking of those days. those wonderful days in the varsity. doing what she loves best. designing.
sleepless. sometimes without food too. however did they manage?
they did not have archi software then. they had drawing boards. t-squares. set squares. and those very expensive technical drawing pens which often broke down after extensive use.
they had their personal space in the studios where some did their work 24 hours a day, especially the boys. especially near project handing up time.
all of them would look groggy, unkempt, red-eyed. did they even bathe?
her roomates were not from her faculty. more often than not they would fail to understand the chaos she created in the room when completing her design assignments.
she smiles when thinking of those days. those wonderful days in the varsity. doing what she loves best. designing.
why lie?
in a big hall. she is the landowner. the opponent - the developer who is building hundreds of townhouses, commercial blocks, 11 storey apartments right next to her fruit orchard on the hill slope of the village 'behind the island'. yes, in penang. where hills are being flattened every other day. with a speed so astonishing you won't have time to say " ouch" !
the proposed development is higher up the slope .
outside the hall she heard the developer's reps laugh as they looked at her and her eldest girl.
"only 2?" they smirked. they laughed too soon. yes, only 2 complainants came. but these not too intelligent looking reps were to be soon humbled.
the local government council listened as she systematically listed her points. complaints. her anger. irreparable damage to her fruit orchard.
site clearing and hill cutting even before planning permission is granted?
preposterous, the chairperson was annoyed. and rightly so.
she wanted in black and white the right to compensation if anything were to happen to/in her fruit orchard as a result of the developer's works/proposal as a whole.
she wanted details of the retaining wall proposed between her land and the developer's.
she wanted details of the drainage system. the flood mitigation plans. the subterranean water management. the EIA. the pre-emptive measures for hillslope stability.
she wanted the date the developer will provide all these. no 'next week'. the exact date.
because of the illegal rampant site clearing and hill cutting by the developer, her fruit trees are dying. the river is silting and water is flooding her land. the ecology system is disrupted. the fruit trees need insects and other agents of pollination, fertilisation. now no more. the trees do not bear fruit anymore. the traditional Malay village in the vicinity is threatened. the proposed sewage treatment plant will be next to a village house. the socio-cultural system is on the balance. she referred to the numerous cases of hillslope instability as recent as a week ago on the island.
how much do you compensate for the destruction of fruit trees, durian trees, hundreds of years old?
the assembly by then realised she was not just another layman to be easily duped by the 'new' system on the island. by their greed. their ego. but actually their plain stupidity.
the developer lied about the hill cutting before permission by the local council is given.
why lie?
don't they know that they will eventually pay for their dishonesty? sooner or later. that is the rule of the world. of the order of things.
do unto others what you wish others to do unto you. it's that simple. but then again, perhaps they do not even understand this. or even heard of it.
the proposed development is higher up the slope .
outside the hall she heard the developer's reps laugh as they looked at her and her eldest girl.
"only 2?" they smirked. they laughed too soon. yes, only 2 complainants came. but these not too intelligent looking reps were to be soon humbled.
the local government council listened as she systematically listed her points. complaints. her anger. irreparable damage to her fruit orchard.
site clearing and hill cutting even before planning permission is granted?
preposterous, the chairperson was annoyed. and rightly so.
she wanted in black and white the right to compensation if anything were to happen to/in her fruit orchard as a result of the developer's works/proposal as a whole.
she wanted details of the retaining wall proposed between her land and the developer's.
she wanted details of the drainage system. the flood mitigation plans. the subterranean water management. the EIA. the pre-emptive measures for hillslope stability.
she wanted the date the developer will provide all these. no 'next week'. the exact date.
because of the illegal rampant site clearing and hill cutting by the developer, her fruit trees are dying. the river is silting and water is flooding her land. the ecology system is disrupted. the fruit trees need insects and other agents of pollination, fertilisation. now no more. the trees do not bear fruit anymore. the traditional Malay village in the vicinity is threatened. the proposed sewage treatment plant will be next to a village house. the socio-cultural system is on the balance. she referred to the numerous cases of hillslope instability as recent as a week ago on the island.
how much do you compensate for the destruction of fruit trees, durian trees, hundreds of years old?
the assembly by then realised she was not just another layman to be easily duped by the 'new' system on the island. by their greed. their ego. but actually their plain stupidity.
the developer lied about the hill cutting before permission by the local council is given.
why lie?
don't they know that they will eventually pay for their dishonesty? sooner or later. that is the rule of the world. of the order of things.
do unto others what you wish others to do unto you. it's that simple. but then again, perhaps they do not even understand this. or even heard of it.
looking for cendol
it was a humid afternoon. they were on the road again. after taking some photographs of the fruit orchard where water from the hills is threatening the durian, mangosteen, rambutan, langsat trees. the price of development? rash development. greed and blatant disregard for the environment. and the ecology. or was it plain ignorance?
her third daughter was driving.her eldest girl was co-pilot. and she was enjoying the scenic villages, the padi fields, the distant blue-green hills.
"why don't we look for the best cendol stall?" she has a penchant for the sweet dessert. and her girls knew it.
so they had cendol with shaved ice. sweet. cold. lovely.
her third daughter was driving.her eldest girl was co-pilot. and she was enjoying the scenic villages, the padi fields, the distant blue-green hills.
"why don't we look for the best cendol stall?" she has a penchant for the sweet dessert. and her girls knew it.
so they had cendol with shaved ice. sweet. cold. lovely.
baju kurung
to her, the baju kurung is simply fabulous. evergreen. ageless.
an apparel common to women throughout the Malay Archipelago for ages, it is the epitome of couture.
it is perfectly suitable for all occasions. official. casual. fit to wear to see the king. and you can don it even at the beach, its voluminous folds caressed by the breeze.
its lines flatter the body by hiding inadequacies or too much curves, it is quietly fashionable, indiscreet yet tantalises. it is in accordance with Islam's protective guidance for women.
it is so pleasant to look at. on young girls. on women. especially on older women.
the baju kurung is one of the world's best. it defies trends. it cannot be conquered.
it is an entity. for eternity.
an apparel common to women throughout the Malay Archipelago for ages, it is the epitome of couture.
it is perfectly suitable for all occasions. official. casual. fit to wear to see the king. and you can don it even at the beach, its voluminous folds caressed by the breeze.
its lines flatter the body by hiding inadequacies or too much curves, it is quietly fashionable, indiscreet yet tantalises. it is in accordance with Islam's protective guidance for women.
it is so pleasant to look at. on young girls. on women. especially on older women.
the baju kurung is one of the world's best. it defies trends. it cannot be conquered.
it is an entity. for eternity.
midnight feasts
those schoolgirl days....
she was in her teens. at the threshold of a brand new world. out of the confines of a beautiful, pampered childhood. practically on her own far far from home.
there were so many perspectives to adapt to, so many views to accommodate as well as to filter. a surprisingly wide scope of talents to discover, nurture and utilise to the fullest.
so much knowledge to acquire!
along the way, they were still kids. her friends. herself. one of their favourites- having midnight birthday parties.
sometimes in the darkened dorm. sometimes in the locker room where they kept their food. the fare was simple. chocolates, biscuits, cakes and drinks. but the fun of it all .
forbidden fruits taste best?
she was in her teens. at the threshold of a brand new world. out of the confines of a beautiful, pampered childhood. practically on her own far far from home.
there were so many perspectives to adapt to, so many views to accommodate as well as to filter. a surprisingly wide scope of talents to discover, nurture and utilise to the fullest.
so much knowledge to acquire!
along the way, they were still kids. her friends. herself. one of their favourites- having midnight birthday parties.
sometimes in the darkened dorm. sometimes in the locker room where they kept their food. the fare was simple. chocolates, biscuits, cakes and drinks. but the fun of it all .
forbidden fruits taste best?
Monday, 24 September 2012
hati, mengapa bersedih? ii
indahkan z, hari itu?
walau esoknya kita akan berpisah, aku tidak mau bersedih ketika itu. kerana terlalu banyak waktu nanti untuk bersedih bila kelak kau telah pergi.
"mengapa tangkai dan kelopak bercerai z?"
manis, kelopak jatuh supaya putik menjadi buah. pengorbanan kelopak demi kebahagiaan pohon nan rendang.
sebenarnya kelopak tidak bercerai dengan tangkai z?
tidak manis, aku akan kembali dengan kejayaan kita berdua kelak. kau inspirasiku. tanpamu aku binasa.
itulah sumpah sucimu z.
berat sekali ku lihat kau bertolak esoknya. ketika kau tidak kelihatan lagi dilarikan keretapi, tiba saja aku merasa kosong. vacuum.
seperti tiba saja sebahagian dari diriku hilang entah ke mana. dan aku tidak tahu di mana untuk mencarinya.
sejak itu mulalah suatu penantian yang tidak berhujung. hari-hari sepi datang menyapa dan berlalu.
menari-nari di depan mataku. mengusik hatiku.
suratmu adalah mentariku. jika suratmu tidak tiba, hariku gelap dan sejuk. aku jadi hamba pada perasaan.
tetapi z, mengapa tiba saja suratmu bertukar wajah?
dan kini tiada langsung? sepi. bagai setitis air terakhir yang meresap ke dalam pasir di sahara.
z, sebenarnya kau tidak pernah menumpahkan kasihmu padaku. itu yang sebenarnya.
tanyalah pada angin. tanyalah pada pucuk nyiur yang melambai-lambai.....
sebenarnya z, kasihmu hanyalah pada seorang gadis. bukan untuk diriku.
cuma kebetulan aku gadis yang berdiri di depanmu ketika itu.
bukan kerana diriku sebagai aku!
utusan msia 29.11.1979,. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ dewi sutera
walau esoknya kita akan berpisah, aku tidak mau bersedih ketika itu. kerana terlalu banyak waktu nanti untuk bersedih bila kelak kau telah pergi.
"mengapa tangkai dan kelopak bercerai z?"
manis, kelopak jatuh supaya putik menjadi buah. pengorbanan kelopak demi kebahagiaan pohon nan rendang.
sebenarnya kelopak tidak bercerai dengan tangkai z?
tidak manis, aku akan kembali dengan kejayaan kita berdua kelak. kau inspirasiku. tanpamu aku binasa.
itulah sumpah sucimu z.
berat sekali ku lihat kau bertolak esoknya. ketika kau tidak kelihatan lagi dilarikan keretapi, tiba saja aku merasa kosong. vacuum.
seperti tiba saja sebahagian dari diriku hilang entah ke mana. dan aku tidak tahu di mana untuk mencarinya.
sejak itu mulalah suatu penantian yang tidak berhujung. hari-hari sepi datang menyapa dan berlalu.
menari-nari di depan mataku. mengusik hatiku.
suratmu adalah mentariku. jika suratmu tidak tiba, hariku gelap dan sejuk. aku jadi hamba pada perasaan.
tetapi z, mengapa tiba saja suratmu bertukar wajah?
dan kini tiada langsung? sepi. bagai setitis air terakhir yang meresap ke dalam pasir di sahara.
z, sebenarnya kau tidak pernah menumpahkan kasihmu padaku. itu yang sebenarnya.
tanyalah pada angin. tanyalah pada pucuk nyiur yang melambai-lambai.....
sebenarnya z, kasihmu hanyalah pada seorang gadis. bukan untuk diriku.
cuma kebetulan aku gadis yang berdiri di depanmu ketika itu.
bukan kerana diriku sebagai aku!
utusan msia 29.11.1979,. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ dewi sutera
hati, mengapa bersedih?
aku membuang masa lagi petang ini. melihat anak-anak bermain di luar sana. riuh-rendah. tetapi aku tidak menumpang keriangan mereka.
hati, mengapa bersedih? perasaan, mengapa ingin melayang jauh? mengapa begitu z?
seperti saja aku terlihat kau berlari-lari bersama anak-anak itu. kau suka berlari begitu z, suka mengusik aku.
seperti suatu senja dulu di pantai. ingatkah lagi z? kau berlari meninggalkan aku. menakutkan aku.
tetapi itu cuma usikan. kau tidak meninggalkan aku. kau kembali ke sampingku.
dan ombak yang berlabuh di pasir halus merestui kita. percikan air masin yang menyentuh pipiku adalah serpihan doa dari alam yang menyintai kita!
ingatkah lagi z?
tetapi kini di manakah petang-petang mesra? mana perginya malam-malam manja? di manakah kau z?
rasanya terlalu lama kau tiada. mungkin ini kerana aku cuma setiap hari mengira lelehan waktu. dan waktu kerapkali membawa aku begitu jauh...
tetapi waktu tidak berjaya menerbangkan aku jauh dari kenangan. dari arca-arca hari-hari manis bersamamu.waktu juga tidak dapat membantuku melawan kesedihan yang kini menjadi parasit dalam diriku.
ah z betapa manisnya di sampingmu. masih jelas padaku sehari sebelum kau pergi meninggalkan aku. pergi untuk mengharung lautan bergelora, untuk kelak menuai segala kutipan ilmu. itu katamu.
utusan msia 29/11/1979. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ sdewi sutera
hati, mengapa bersedih? perasaan, mengapa ingin melayang jauh? mengapa begitu z?
seperti saja aku terlihat kau berlari-lari bersama anak-anak itu. kau suka berlari begitu z, suka mengusik aku.
seperti suatu senja dulu di pantai. ingatkah lagi z? kau berlari meninggalkan aku. menakutkan aku.
tetapi itu cuma usikan. kau tidak meninggalkan aku. kau kembali ke sampingku.
dan ombak yang berlabuh di pasir halus merestui kita. percikan air masin yang menyentuh pipiku adalah serpihan doa dari alam yang menyintai kita!
ingatkah lagi z?
tetapi kini di manakah petang-petang mesra? mana perginya malam-malam manja? di manakah kau z?
rasanya terlalu lama kau tiada. mungkin ini kerana aku cuma setiap hari mengira lelehan waktu. dan waktu kerapkali membawa aku begitu jauh...
tetapi waktu tidak berjaya menerbangkan aku jauh dari kenangan. dari arca-arca hari-hari manis bersamamu.waktu juga tidak dapat membantuku melawan kesedihan yang kini menjadi parasit dalam diriku.
ah z betapa manisnya di sampingmu. masih jelas padaku sehari sebelum kau pergi meninggalkan aku. pergi untuk mengharung lautan bergelora, untuk kelak menuai segala kutipan ilmu. itu katamu.
utusan msia 29/11/1979. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ sdewi sutera
di hujung pelangi vii
jazmi, lelaki romantis yang gemar berbisik-bisik. berkumis tipis berkaca mata tebal. lelaki yang bakal mengisi seluruh ruang hidupnya.
tak sabar dia untuk mencurahkan kerinduan pada jazmi. sarat suaranya dengan rasa kasih menyentuh sukma jazmi.
dia melihat pada sebuah kotak baldu ungu di tangan jazmi. inilah saat-saat diimpikan. tidak sia-sia dia meredah malam berhujan.
jazmi tunduk seketika, jari menguis rambut di dahi. suasana tegang. berbahaya. jazmi tidak keruan.
angin hujan semakin galak menghembus. berputar-putar. berdesing-desing. menderu-deru dari hujung dunia.
jazmi berasa sejuk ke dalam hati. apakah yang dicari sebenarnya dalam hidup ini?
namun dia tidak boleh berlengah lagi. keputusan sudah dibuat. tidak mungkin ditangguh lagi.
"maafkan aku .... kita terpaksa berpisah. aku tak sampai hati menduakan isteriku. dia terlalu setia. terlalu bergantung padaku. dia tidak seperti kau. kau kuat dan mampu berdikari. ambillah pemberian ikhlas ini dariku. sebagai kenangan ....."
angin dan hujan meraung di atas permukaan laut.
seorang wanita rebah di pesisir pantai.....
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
tak sabar dia untuk mencurahkan kerinduan pada jazmi. sarat suaranya dengan rasa kasih menyentuh sukma jazmi.
dia melihat pada sebuah kotak baldu ungu di tangan jazmi. inilah saat-saat diimpikan. tidak sia-sia dia meredah malam berhujan.
jazmi tunduk seketika, jari menguis rambut di dahi. suasana tegang. berbahaya. jazmi tidak keruan.
angin hujan semakin galak menghembus. berputar-putar. berdesing-desing. menderu-deru dari hujung dunia.
jazmi berasa sejuk ke dalam hati. apakah yang dicari sebenarnya dalam hidup ini?
namun dia tidak boleh berlengah lagi. keputusan sudah dibuat. tidak mungkin ditangguh lagi.
"maafkan aku .... kita terpaksa berpisah. aku tak sampai hati menduakan isteriku. dia terlalu setia. terlalu bergantung padaku. dia tidak seperti kau. kau kuat dan mampu berdikari. ambillah pemberian ikhlas ini dariku. sebagai kenangan ....."
angin dan hujan meraung di atas permukaan laut.
seorang wanita rebah di pesisir pantai.....
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
di hujung pelangi vi
malam kelam tidak berbintang. hujan sudah reda. jalan melalui kampung suram tiada indah. sesekali dia rasa mengantuk. radio diperkuatkan. sebuah lagu berirama rap membantu menyegarkannya.
percintaan di usia lewat 30-an ini amat perit. lebih hebat dari cinta remaja. mencarik-carik kewarasan. merobek-robek kekentalan jiwa.
dari jauh terlihat lampu neon pengkalan L berkedipan menyambutnya. bagaikan berpesta lagaknya. dia memecut keretanya ke hotel kejora timur di tepi laut.
tibalah dia dipenghujung perjalanannya. setelah puas mengharung liku malam dan hujan. setelah bertahun mendambakan damai dari kasih seorang lelaki yang tulus.
di sini bagai di hujung pelangi.
dia yakin akan bertemu emas berlimpahan.
angin hujan bertiup kencang dari laut lepas. membasahkan dingin malam. angin yang sangat disenanginya. bersih dan nyaman. angin pembawa rahmat. setelah kemarau panjang.
dia memberhentikan kereta.mencapai botol poisson dari beg. jarinya pantas menyapu haruman itu ke pergelangan tangan, di dahi. semerbak wangian lembut.
jazmi sedang menanti berhampiran kolam renang. di sebuah meja kecil beralas kain cita merah saga berhias sekuntum mawar putih. jazmi bangun mendapatkannya.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
percintaan di usia lewat 30-an ini amat perit. lebih hebat dari cinta remaja. mencarik-carik kewarasan. merobek-robek kekentalan jiwa.
dari jauh terlihat lampu neon pengkalan L berkedipan menyambutnya. bagaikan berpesta lagaknya. dia memecut keretanya ke hotel kejora timur di tepi laut.
tibalah dia dipenghujung perjalanannya. setelah puas mengharung liku malam dan hujan. setelah bertahun mendambakan damai dari kasih seorang lelaki yang tulus.
di sini bagai di hujung pelangi.
dia yakin akan bertemu emas berlimpahan.
angin hujan bertiup kencang dari laut lepas. membasahkan dingin malam. angin yang sangat disenanginya. bersih dan nyaman. angin pembawa rahmat. setelah kemarau panjang.
dia memberhentikan kereta.mencapai botol poisson dari beg. jarinya pantas menyapu haruman itu ke pergelangan tangan, di dahi. semerbak wangian lembut.
jazmi sedang menanti berhampiran kolam renang. di sebuah meja kecil beralas kain cita merah saga berhias sekuntum mawar putih. jazmi bangun mendapatkannya.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
di hujung pelangi v
mata jazmi singgah pada wanita manja di depannya. bijak berbicara, pandai bermain kata, cukup memikat. semakin hari bertanbah jelita dilihatnya. seri di wajahnya kian menggoda.
jazmi membariskan isterinya laila dengan kekasih kali keduanya ini. dia cuba tetapi gagal untuk membela laila. ternyata banyak kelemahan yang ketara pada laila.
setelah mempunyai 3 anak, laila mula menjauhkan diri darinya. sedangkan sebagai suami jazmi masih perlukan belaian mesra seorang isteri.
dan kini jazmi lemas dalam kemesraan syahdu. bersama kekasih lama yang penyayang. hingga kadangkala hampir hilang pedoman dibuatnya.
"kalau gadis belasan tahun tu, barulah berbaloi. ini kau cari janda yang dah dekat 40 tahun! kau mengigau ke jaz?" rakan karibnya nordin ketawa berdekah-dekah.
"dia nampak lebih muda dari usianya din. lagipun dia ni istimewa, satu dalam seribu.cinta kali ini lebih kepada keserasian fikiran aku dan dia. kami seperti 2 remaja bila bersama."
"apapun kau mesti fikir dalam-dalam jaz. ini bukan perkara main-main. kesian anak-anak kau. terutama si rafiq yang masih kecil tu."
cinta kali kedua bagai meniti jambatan berduri. tetapi tetap meruntun-runtun naluri yang dahaga. cinta yang menjanjikan masalah berganda.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
jazmi membariskan isterinya laila dengan kekasih kali keduanya ini. dia cuba tetapi gagal untuk membela laila. ternyata banyak kelemahan yang ketara pada laila.
setelah mempunyai 3 anak, laila mula menjauhkan diri darinya. sedangkan sebagai suami jazmi masih perlukan belaian mesra seorang isteri.
dan kini jazmi lemas dalam kemesraan syahdu. bersama kekasih lama yang penyayang. hingga kadangkala hampir hilang pedoman dibuatnya.
"kalau gadis belasan tahun tu, barulah berbaloi. ini kau cari janda yang dah dekat 40 tahun! kau mengigau ke jaz?" rakan karibnya nordin ketawa berdekah-dekah.
"dia nampak lebih muda dari usianya din. lagipun dia ni istimewa, satu dalam seribu.cinta kali ini lebih kepada keserasian fikiran aku dan dia. kami seperti 2 remaja bila bersama."
"apapun kau mesti fikir dalam-dalam jaz. ini bukan perkara main-main. kesian anak-anak kau. terutama si rafiq yang masih kecil tu."
cinta kali kedua bagai meniti jambatan berduri. tetapi tetap meruntun-runtun naluri yang dahaga. cinta yang menjanjikan masalah berganda.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
di hujung pelangi iv
"kita nikah saja sayang.... jangan buat aku tunggu terlalu lama. kau pun sudah bebas sekarang." jazmi berbisik di celah deru angin segar pulau P.
dia mengenggam jari jemari jazmi, terasa hangat. dia merenung dalam-dalam ke mata jazmi. hakikat menjadi isteri kedua sesekali menyelitkan rasa tidak selesa dalam dirinya.
"kadang-kadang aku rasa bersalah terhadap isterimu, anak-anakmu .... inikah yang kita mahukan j?"
j panggilan manja sejak dulu lagi. sejak dia di tingkatan enam dan jazmi di tahun kedua ipta.
itu cinta pertama dia dan jazmi. cinta bergetaran teruna dan dara yang mengangkat mereka terawang-awang di antara langit dan bumi. jauh dari realiti.
pertemuan pertama satu kebetulan di hentian bas di petang bening. dia menggalas beg untuk bercuti di kampung. jazmi pula telah menghabiskan cuti dan menuju ke kolej di ibukota.
senja itu 2 hati bertegur sapa.
begitu senang sebuah cinta bermula. 2 jiwa remaja bermain-main, mengusik-usik. lalu terperangkap dalam jaring perasaan yang merubah segalanya. indah habis bercinta. tetapi bila berkahwin nanti akan bersisakah keindahan itu?
"aku termimpi-mimpi kita di pantai sunyi berbulan madu..." jazmi diam. mukanya berwarna resah. matanya terlontar jauh. menembusi horizon.
"tetapi .... wajarkah aku membuang isteriku begitu saja? padahal dulu akulah yang menjemputnya berkongsi hidup denganku ..." jazmi bangun. tempias air terjun gagal membasuh keruh di dahi.
tanpa diketahuinya jazmi tiba di persimpangan kelabu. antara cinta hangat pada wanita terlarang dan kasih pada anak isteri yang setia menanti di rumah.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
dia mengenggam jari jemari jazmi, terasa hangat. dia merenung dalam-dalam ke mata jazmi. hakikat menjadi isteri kedua sesekali menyelitkan rasa tidak selesa dalam dirinya.
"kadang-kadang aku rasa bersalah terhadap isterimu, anak-anakmu .... inikah yang kita mahukan j?"
j panggilan manja sejak dulu lagi. sejak dia di tingkatan enam dan jazmi di tahun kedua ipta.
itu cinta pertama dia dan jazmi. cinta bergetaran teruna dan dara yang mengangkat mereka terawang-awang di antara langit dan bumi. jauh dari realiti.
pertemuan pertama satu kebetulan di hentian bas di petang bening. dia menggalas beg untuk bercuti di kampung. jazmi pula telah menghabiskan cuti dan menuju ke kolej di ibukota.
senja itu 2 hati bertegur sapa.
begitu senang sebuah cinta bermula. 2 jiwa remaja bermain-main, mengusik-usik. lalu terperangkap dalam jaring perasaan yang merubah segalanya. indah habis bercinta. tetapi bila berkahwin nanti akan bersisakah keindahan itu?
"aku termimpi-mimpi kita di pantai sunyi berbulan madu..." jazmi diam. mukanya berwarna resah. matanya terlontar jauh. menembusi horizon.
"tetapi .... wajarkah aku membuang isteriku begitu saja? padahal dulu akulah yang menjemputnya berkongsi hidup denganku ..." jazmi bangun. tempias air terjun gagal membasuh keruh di dahi.
tanpa diketahuinya jazmi tiba di persimpangan kelabu. antara cinta hangat pada wanita terlarang dan kasih pada anak isteri yang setia menanti di rumah.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
di hujung pelangi iii
aneh bila difikirkan. setelah 20 tahun terpisah, menjalani hidup yang berbeza, tiba-tiba kitaran waktu yang tidak difahami mempertemukan mereka semula.
dia telah setahun berpisah dengan bekas suami. jazmi pula di ambang kebosanan sebuah perkahwinan yang menjangkau 10 tahun.
entah mengapa dia begitu senang tewas kepada hembusan cinta dari lelaki yang pernah disayanginya.
"kakak tak serik ke dengan lelaki?" adiknya lina mengajukan soalan yang tidak digemarinya.
"baru setahun bergelar janda sudah jatuh hati!" lina empat tahun lebih muda darinya tetapi ada waktu lebih matang pandanganya.
"tapi j bukan sebarang lelaki lina. kakak kenal hati budinya."
"berhati-hatilah kak, takut kalau j hanya ingin membalas dendam pada kakak'"
"tak mungkin lina, j baik orangnya. kakak tahu dia ikhlas. jangan kau risau. kakak yakin kami diberi peluang kedua."
mereka berpisah dulupun kerana dia yang tinggalkan jazmi. angkara fikiran remaja yang tidak rasional dia berpaling pandang. jazmi yang tidak berdosa dihumban ke lurah perit.
kini dia ingin betulkan sejarah. jazmi yang pemaaf sedia menerimanya buat kali kedua. keikhlasan jazmi antara pedang menikam hatinya, melemahkan ketahanan dirinya, menawan segenap rongga perasaannya.
walau jazmi kini suami orang, dia tidak dapat menghalang dirinya dari membalas permintaan lelaki yang muncul dari lipatan sejarah hidupnya itu.
mereka sebenarnya belum puas bercinta.masing-masing masih mencari-cari sesuatu yang belum pasti.
kini sudah 3 bulan dia dan jazmi dibuai rasa yang mengancam untuk memporak-perandakan 2 keluarga.
anak-anaknya belum diberitahu lagi tentang kehadiran bakal seorang bapa tiri. isteri jazmi khabarnya sudah mula syak tentang ketidakjujuran suaminya.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
dia telah setahun berpisah dengan bekas suami. jazmi pula di ambang kebosanan sebuah perkahwinan yang menjangkau 10 tahun.
entah mengapa dia begitu senang tewas kepada hembusan cinta dari lelaki yang pernah disayanginya.
"kakak tak serik ke dengan lelaki?" adiknya lina mengajukan soalan yang tidak digemarinya.
"baru setahun bergelar janda sudah jatuh hati!" lina empat tahun lebih muda darinya tetapi ada waktu lebih matang pandanganya.
"tapi j bukan sebarang lelaki lina. kakak kenal hati budinya."
"berhati-hatilah kak, takut kalau j hanya ingin membalas dendam pada kakak'"
"tak mungkin lina, j baik orangnya. kakak tahu dia ikhlas. jangan kau risau. kakak yakin kami diberi peluang kedua."
mereka berpisah dulupun kerana dia yang tinggalkan jazmi. angkara fikiran remaja yang tidak rasional dia berpaling pandang. jazmi yang tidak berdosa dihumban ke lurah perit.
kini dia ingin betulkan sejarah. jazmi yang pemaaf sedia menerimanya buat kali kedua. keikhlasan jazmi antara pedang menikam hatinya, melemahkan ketahanan dirinya, menawan segenap rongga perasaannya.
walau jazmi kini suami orang, dia tidak dapat menghalang dirinya dari membalas permintaan lelaki yang muncul dari lipatan sejarah hidupnya itu.
mereka sebenarnya belum puas bercinta.masing-masing masih mencari-cari sesuatu yang belum pasti.
kini sudah 3 bulan dia dan jazmi dibuai rasa yang mengancam untuk memporak-perandakan 2 keluarga.
anak-anaknya belum diberitahu lagi tentang kehadiran bakal seorang bapa tiri. isteri jazmi khabarnya sudah mula syak tentang ketidakjujuran suaminya.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
di hujung pelangi ii
dia termenung sebentar. naluri keibuannya tersentuh melihat dira menangis begitu. namun desakan rindu dan suatu keperluan perasaan mengatasi kehendak anaknya.
dia tidak teragak-agak memilih untuk bertemu kekasihnya malam ini. dan meninggalkan bersendirian anaknya yang akan menghadapi peperiksaan utama yang pertama.
titisan hujan masih berlumba-lumba menuruni windscreen kereta. waktu sudah menjangkau 8 malam. tidak banyak kenderaan lain di jalan.
"aku akan tiba di pengkalan L pukul 10 malam. janganlah tergesa-gesa. pandu kereta tu biar berhati-hati. kita jumpa ya .... ada sesuatu yang ingin ku beri padamu .... penting..." lembut suara jazmi di telefon semalam.
hatinya berdebar-debar. bagaimana nanti dia harus menerima lamaran jazmi? dia sebenarnya sudah terlupa cara seorang wanita berhadapan dengan situasi sensitif itu.
perlukah dia menunjukkan rasa bahagia yang melonjak-lonjak? ataupun lebih sopan baginya berselindung di sebalik sebuah senyuman malu sahaja?
apakah jazmi akan menyarung sebuah cincin permata di malam ini juga? jazmi tentu masih ingat bahawa permata kesukaannya ialah amethyst. rona ungu cair bak lembayung senja halus kilauannya penuh misteri.
dan sebagai seorang kekasih yang tidak sabar tentu jazmi akan meminta dipercepatkan hari perkahwinan mereka.
mampukah nanti dia membendung kebahagiaan sehebat ini? segala harapan yang terhimpun hingga ke saat ini akan mekar berbunga. pengkalan L akan menjadi saksi kepada sebuah hasrat yang tercapai jua akhirnya!
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
dia tidak teragak-agak memilih untuk bertemu kekasihnya malam ini. dan meninggalkan bersendirian anaknya yang akan menghadapi peperiksaan utama yang pertama.
titisan hujan masih berlumba-lumba menuruni windscreen kereta. waktu sudah menjangkau 8 malam. tidak banyak kenderaan lain di jalan.
"aku akan tiba di pengkalan L pukul 10 malam. janganlah tergesa-gesa. pandu kereta tu biar berhati-hati. kita jumpa ya .... ada sesuatu yang ingin ku beri padamu .... penting..." lembut suara jazmi di telefon semalam.
hatinya berdebar-debar. bagaimana nanti dia harus menerima lamaran jazmi? dia sebenarnya sudah terlupa cara seorang wanita berhadapan dengan situasi sensitif itu.
perlukah dia menunjukkan rasa bahagia yang melonjak-lonjak? ataupun lebih sopan baginya berselindung di sebalik sebuah senyuman malu sahaja?
apakah jazmi akan menyarung sebuah cincin permata di malam ini juga? jazmi tentu masih ingat bahawa permata kesukaannya ialah amethyst. rona ungu cair bak lembayung senja halus kilauannya penuh misteri.
dan sebagai seorang kekasih yang tidak sabar tentu jazmi akan meminta dipercepatkan hari perkahwinan mereka.
mampukah nanti dia membendung kebahagiaan sehebat ini? segala harapan yang terhimpun hingga ke saat ini akan mekar berbunga. pengkalan L akan menjadi saksi kepada sebuah hasrat yang tercapai jua akhirnya!
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
di hujung pelangi i
sesekali pancaran kilat menyilaukan mata. dia perlahankan proton satria hijaunya. hujan lebat mencurah-curah. mengehadkan penglihatannya sehingga 1 meter sahaja.
pengkalan L masih jauh, malam semakin larut. lagu 'selasihku sayang' mendayu-dayu di radio. rasa bahagia di hatinya kian semarak. bercambah dan menjalar. menyentuh setiap ruang dalam dirinya.
"ibu, esok exam UPSR dira kan?" anaknya bersuara sebaik saja dia melangkah keluar pintu rumahnya petang tadi. dia terhenti seketika.
"tetapi ibu terpaksa pergi malam ni juga. pak su hantar dira ke sekolah esok ya sayang?"
dia memegang bahu dira, merayu sebuah pengertian.
"dira nak ibu hantar!"
jelas kelihatan perubahan di wajah kelat dira, anak sulungnya. gadis baru mencecah usia 12 tahun yang semakin kerap merajuk akhir-akhir ini.
"ibu ada hal penting malam ni;"
"lebih penting dari dira?" dan anaknya berlari masuk, airmata berguguran di pipi.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
pengkalan L masih jauh, malam semakin larut. lagu 'selasihku sayang' mendayu-dayu di radio. rasa bahagia di hatinya kian semarak. bercambah dan menjalar. menyentuh setiap ruang dalam dirinya.
"ibu, esok exam UPSR dira kan?" anaknya bersuara sebaik saja dia melangkah keluar pintu rumahnya petang tadi. dia terhenti seketika.
"tetapi ibu terpaksa pergi malam ni juga. pak su hantar dira ke sekolah esok ya sayang?"
dia memegang bahu dira, merayu sebuah pengertian.
"dira nak ibu hantar!"
jelas kelihatan perubahan di wajah kelat dira, anak sulungnya. gadis baru mencecah usia 12 tahun yang semakin kerap merajuk akhir-akhir ini.
"ibu ada hal penting malam ni;"
"lebih penting dari dira?" dan anaknya berlari masuk, airmata berguguran di pipi.
majalah wanita 1999. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ riana delia
Sunday, 23 September 2012
selamat tinggal langkawi iv
tidakku sangka kedatanganku ke sini akan menemukan kita berdua. kau tiba saja muncul dalam ruang hidupku.
aku telah jatuh cinta pada pulaumu ini j. pada keheningan bermandi embun di telaga tujuh. pada pesta warna ufuk barat dan malam bulan terang di pantai cenang nan damai. pada deru angin hujan di pantai tanjong rhu. pada kehijauan. pada ...
atau adakah ini semua kerana kehadiranmu j? adakah kau yang membuat pulau ini bagaikan syurga untukku?
telah terlalu lama aku memburu kedamaian ini. telah sekian lama aku merindui sebuah wajah redup untuk mengisi petak-petak kosong dalam jiwaku.
"aku akan pulang minggu depan j'"
"dan aku akan menyusulimu lia. aku takkan dapat di sini lagi tanpamu'"
airmataku gugur satu-satu.
tetapi langkawi, kisah hidup puterimu Mahsuri tidak berakhir dengan bahagia. seperti kisah pertemuan kita j. sebuah pertemuan yang tidak menjanjikan kebahagiaan.
itulah sebabnya aku tinggalkan kau j.
aku tinggalkan pulau kelahiranmu itu dengan tergesa-gesa tanpa memberitahumu.
aku sebenarnya lari darimu j. dari sebuah kisah tanpa akhir.
aku bukan untukmu sayang.......
1/9/1987 utusan msia. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ s dewi
aku telah jatuh cinta pada pulaumu ini j. pada keheningan bermandi embun di telaga tujuh. pada pesta warna ufuk barat dan malam bulan terang di pantai cenang nan damai. pada deru angin hujan di pantai tanjong rhu. pada kehijauan. pada ...
atau adakah ini semua kerana kehadiranmu j? adakah kau yang membuat pulau ini bagaikan syurga untukku?
telah terlalu lama aku memburu kedamaian ini. telah sekian lama aku merindui sebuah wajah redup untuk mengisi petak-petak kosong dalam jiwaku.
"aku akan pulang minggu depan j'"
"dan aku akan menyusulimu lia. aku takkan dapat di sini lagi tanpamu'"
airmataku gugur satu-satu.
tetapi langkawi, kisah hidup puterimu Mahsuri tidak berakhir dengan bahagia. seperti kisah pertemuan kita j. sebuah pertemuan yang tidak menjanjikan kebahagiaan.
itulah sebabnya aku tinggalkan kau j.
aku tinggalkan pulau kelahiranmu itu dengan tergesa-gesa tanpa memberitahumu.
aku sebenarnya lari darimu j. dari sebuah kisah tanpa akhir.
aku bukan untukmu sayang.......
1/9/1987 utusan msia. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam/ s dewi
selamat tinggal langkawi iii
"kau tidak mau tahu siapakah dewi kayangan yang kini mengisi mimpiku setiap malam dan khayalanku setiap siang?"
"aku takut j!"
"mengapa?"
"pulaumu ini j terlalu sarat dengan legenda dan trajedi. aku tak pasti adakah ini cuma satu realiti . atau cuma sebuah impian kejam yang bakal membuat aku derita!"
"kau mau aku bersumpah lia?"
"jangan j, jangan kau ulang sejarah lama. telah banyak penderitaan di bumi langkawi ini."
aku tiba-tiba merasa angin laut yang sejuk.
"aku takut j!"
"mengapa?"
"pulaumu ini j terlalu sarat dengan legenda dan trajedi. aku tak pasti adakah ini cuma satu realiti . atau cuma sebuah impian kejam yang bakal membuat aku derita!"
"kau mau aku bersumpah lia?"
"jangan j, jangan kau ulang sejarah lama. telah banyak penderitaan di bumi langkawi ini."
aku tiba-tiba merasa angin laut yang sejuk.
selamat tinggal langkawi ii
namun jauh di sudut hati akan ku simpan rapi memori bersamamu.
"indah sungguh pulau mu ini j!"
"tapi bagiku indah lagi seorang bidadari dari tanah besar semenanjung yang tiba-tiba muncul untuk menganggu ketenangan hatiku!"
'kau lebih memuja kecantikan wanita dari alam semulajadi?"
"buat pertama kali aku kalah dengan wanita. denganmu alia. aku sanggup tinggalkan kampung halaman keranamu jika perlu!"
ku lihat permukaan tasik dayang bunting berkocak. seperti hujung hatiku yang tersentuh lembut.
begitu pantas kita berseloka ya j? bagaikan tidak berteka-teki lagi.
aku baru 2 minggu berseminar di pulau bersejarah ini. tetapi hatiku menyatakan kita telah lama bertemu. hati kita telah lama bertegur sapa. mungkinkah di suatu dimensi lain?
dan sebenarnya pertemuan kita ini bukan secara tidak sengaja?
"indah sungguh pulau mu ini j!"
"tapi bagiku indah lagi seorang bidadari dari tanah besar semenanjung yang tiba-tiba muncul untuk menganggu ketenangan hatiku!"
'kau lebih memuja kecantikan wanita dari alam semulajadi?"
"buat pertama kali aku kalah dengan wanita. denganmu alia. aku sanggup tinggalkan kampung halaman keranamu jika perlu!"
ku lihat permukaan tasik dayang bunting berkocak. seperti hujung hatiku yang tersentuh lembut.
begitu pantas kita berseloka ya j? bagaikan tidak berteka-teki lagi.
aku baru 2 minggu berseminar di pulau bersejarah ini. tetapi hatiku menyatakan kita telah lama bertemu. hati kita telah lama bertegur sapa. mungkinkah di suatu dimensi lain?
dan sebenarnya pertemuan kita ini bukan secara tidak sengaja?
selamat tinggal langkawi
"selamat tinggal langkawi'" itu saja yang dapat ku ucapkan.
aku semakin sebak dan airmata pun bagai tak dapat dibendung lagi.
bintang samudra mulai renggang dari pengkalan. ku toleh ke belakang. ingin ku rakam gugusan kepulauan amat ku kagumi ini.
"alia.... alia.... alia..... " jeritmu sambil berlari. tetapi kau telah terlambat. feri telah terlepas dari tambatan. setiap saat laut biru pekat kian menjarakkan antara kita.
itulah gambaran akhir buatku tentang langkawi dan seorang jejaka yang cuba menghulur sebuah perkenalan.
maafkan aku j! mungkinkah kau dapat melihat butir-butir airmata yang gugur di pipiku tadi?
sebenarnya kau tidak akan tahu ada duka yang semakin mendalam di hati ini. biar kau kekal dengan anggapanmu j. biar kau membenci diriku. aku rela.
aku semakin sebak dan airmata pun bagai tak dapat dibendung lagi.
bintang samudra mulai renggang dari pengkalan. ku toleh ke belakang. ingin ku rakam gugusan kepulauan amat ku kagumi ini.
"alia.... alia.... alia..... " jeritmu sambil berlari. tetapi kau telah terlambat. feri telah terlepas dari tambatan. setiap saat laut biru pekat kian menjarakkan antara kita.
itulah gambaran akhir buatku tentang langkawi dan seorang jejaka yang cuba menghulur sebuah perkenalan.
maafkan aku j! mungkinkah kau dapat melihat butir-butir airmata yang gugur di pipiku tadi?
sebenarnya kau tidak akan tahu ada duka yang semakin mendalam di hati ini. biar kau kekal dengan anggapanmu j. biar kau membenci diriku. aku rela.
mencari damai iii
bila aku bertanya, wanita itu berkata, " kami sewa bilik di sini, tak mampu nak sewa sebuah rumah. suami kak hanya kayuh beca. nak beli rumah sendiri jauh sekali." matanya bergenang memandang padaku.
sejalur keinsafan bertandang.
di kelilingi kemakmuran, di zaman IT ini rupanya ada lagi yang terpinggir di sini. ramai lagi yang masih belum bertemu jalan keluar dari himpitan kemiskinan.
Astaghfirullahalazim! mengapa aku tersasar jauh begini? di mana rasa bersyukur yang patut ada dalam diri?
di usia 20-an ini aku sudah punya pekerjaan yang baik dengan masa depan yang cemerlang jika aku bijak menyusun usaha dalam bidang yang sangat aku minati. aku juga sudah memiliki kereta sendiri dan tempat tinggal yang selesa di kawasan kondusif.
melihat sebuah kehidupan penuh dilema di depanku, aku mula muhasabah diri. mula menghargai semua rezeki yang telah diberi Yang Maha Esa padaku.
terasa begitu kecil masalah di tempat kerjaku bila dibandingkan dengan hidup wanita sebangsa dan seagamaku ini. apalah sangat tekanan dari bos aku itu? di manakah ketahanan mental dan fizikalku?
"terima kasih kak!" aku bersalaman dengan wanita separuh umur yang kelihatan kehairanan itu.
"untuk apa dik?" dia bertanya.
"kerana kakak telah sedarkan saya dari mimpi" aku senyum padanya. aku berpaling mencari pakcik tadi.
"mana pakcik tadi kak?"
"pakcik mana?"
"tak apalah kak. mungkin dia telah kembali ke Masjid!"
"tapi ......."
aku tinggalkan wanita itu yang masih menggaru kepala. aku melangkah penuh tekad. bagai tak sabar lagi ke pejabat. membereskan semua tugasan. menjadi seorang yang bersyukur dengan rezeki jua dugaan.
2000, rose avenue. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam
sejalur keinsafan bertandang.
di kelilingi kemakmuran, di zaman IT ini rupanya ada lagi yang terpinggir di sini. ramai lagi yang masih belum bertemu jalan keluar dari himpitan kemiskinan.
Astaghfirullahalazim! mengapa aku tersasar jauh begini? di mana rasa bersyukur yang patut ada dalam diri?
di usia 20-an ini aku sudah punya pekerjaan yang baik dengan masa depan yang cemerlang jika aku bijak menyusun usaha dalam bidang yang sangat aku minati. aku juga sudah memiliki kereta sendiri dan tempat tinggal yang selesa di kawasan kondusif.
melihat sebuah kehidupan penuh dilema di depanku, aku mula muhasabah diri. mula menghargai semua rezeki yang telah diberi Yang Maha Esa padaku.
terasa begitu kecil masalah di tempat kerjaku bila dibandingkan dengan hidup wanita sebangsa dan seagamaku ini. apalah sangat tekanan dari bos aku itu? di manakah ketahanan mental dan fizikalku?
"terima kasih kak!" aku bersalaman dengan wanita separuh umur yang kelihatan kehairanan itu.
"untuk apa dik?" dia bertanya.
"kerana kakak telah sedarkan saya dari mimpi" aku senyum padanya. aku berpaling mencari pakcik tadi.
"mana pakcik tadi kak?"
"pakcik mana?"
"tak apalah kak. mungkin dia telah kembali ke Masjid!"
"tapi ......."
aku tinggalkan wanita itu yang masih menggaru kepala. aku melangkah penuh tekad. bagai tak sabar lagi ke pejabat. membereskan semua tugasan. menjadi seorang yang bersyukur dengan rezeki jua dugaan.
2000, rose avenue. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam
mencari damai ii
tiba-tiba aku merasa sunyi. jalan semakin sempit. tiada lagi kenderaan. tiada lagi hingar-bingar manusia yang terkejar-kejar. cuma kelihatan seorang lelaki tua sedang mengayuh basikal yang seusia dengannya.
rumah-rumah kedai bertukar senibinanya. aku merenung pada ciri rumah Melayu pada tingkap, pintu dinding papan yang bercampur dengan rekabentuk kedai Cina. bertiang bata dengan lepa kapur, lantai jubin terra cotta dan kemasan bumbung jubin Cina.
tetapi semua rumah kedai ini tertutup. tiada penghuni. di manakah aku?
setelah beberapa lama berjalan di kaki lima yang teduh, aku dikejutkan dengan sebuah bangunan lama berbumbung nusantara, sebuah menara tinggi berbentuk octagonal di sisinya. sebuah Masjid lama!
di sekelilingnya beberapa buah rumah Melayu yang hampir roboh!
aku bagai ditarik oleh sesuatu untuk masuk ke dalam masjid.berwudhuk di sebuah kolah berlumut hijau. menunaikan solat Tahiyattul Masjid dan fardhu Zohor.
kemudian aku menyandarkan diri yang gusar ke sebuah tiang dalam ruang utama. sejuknya mengalir ke dalam diri. aku pejamkan mata. damainya.
"anak dari mana?"
aku tersentak. ku lihat seorang lelaki tua berserban putih bersih berjubah
hijau buah zaitun tersenyum tenang di depanku.
"mesti dari pejabat kan?"
aku mengganguk.
"anak tak pernah datang sini kan?" tuturnya lembut dengan sebutan yang agak asing bagiku. "ini Masjid Melayu pertama di tanjong, dibina oleh orang Acheh hampir 200 tahun dahulu."
aku terpukau mendengar cerita seterusnya dari pakcik yang sinonim benar dengan Masjid ini. tentang komuniti Melayu Acheh yang berdagang rempah, batu permata, sutera dan berbagai barangan lagi di sini sejak kurun ke 17 lagi.
di zaman kegemilangan Masjid ini, kawasan ini adalah pusat pendidikan agama Islam dan pusat penerbitan kitab dan buku terkemuka di seluruh kepulauan Nusantara. jua tempat persinggahan jemaah Haji yang akan ke Mekah!
rumah pengasas Masjid, Tengku Syed Hussain Al-Aidid, masih terdiri. kemudian aku melihat pula rumah Kadhi pertama di tanjong, Sheikh Omar Basheer. rumah ini kosong kini.
rumah bersebelahan ada penghuni tetapi cuma penyewa. seorang wanita sedang menyidai kain di ampaian. dua orang kanak-kanak berlari-lari di keliling.
2000 rose avenue. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam
rumah-rumah kedai bertukar senibinanya. aku merenung pada ciri rumah Melayu pada tingkap, pintu dinding papan yang bercampur dengan rekabentuk kedai Cina. bertiang bata dengan lepa kapur, lantai jubin terra cotta dan kemasan bumbung jubin Cina.
tetapi semua rumah kedai ini tertutup. tiada penghuni. di manakah aku?
setelah beberapa lama berjalan di kaki lima yang teduh, aku dikejutkan dengan sebuah bangunan lama berbumbung nusantara, sebuah menara tinggi berbentuk octagonal di sisinya. sebuah Masjid lama!
di sekelilingnya beberapa buah rumah Melayu yang hampir roboh!
aku bagai ditarik oleh sesuatu untuk masuk ke dalam masjid.berwudhuk di sebuah kolah berlumut hijau. menunaikan solat Tahiyattul Masjid dan fardhu Zohor.
kemudian aku menyandarkan diri yang gusar ke sebuah tiang dalam ruang utama. sejuknya mengalir ke dalam diri. aku pejamkan mata. damainya.
"anak dari mana?"
aku tersentak. ku lihat seorang lelaki tua berserban putih bersih berjubah
hijau buah zaitun tersenyum tenang di depanku.
"mesti dari pejabat kan?"
aku mengganguk.
"anak tak pernah datang sini kan?" tuturnya lembut dengan sebutan yang agak asing bagiku. "ini Masjid Melayu pertama di tanjong, dibina oleh orang Acheh hampir 200 tahun dahulu."
aku terpukau mendengar cerita seterusnya dari pakcik yang sinonim benar dengan Masjid ini. tentang komuniti Melayu Acheh yang berdagang rempah, batu permata, sutera dan berbagai barangan lagi di sini sejak kurun ke 17 lagi.
di zaman kegemilangan Masjid ini, kawasan ini adalah pusat pendidikan agama Islam dan pusat penerbitan kitab dan buku terkemuka di seluruh kepulauan Nusantara. jua tempat persinggahan jemaah Haji yang akan ke Mekah!
rumah pengasas Masjid, Tengku Syed Hussain Al-Aidid, masih terdiri. kemudian aku melihat pula rumah Kadhi pertama di tanjong, Sheikh Omar Basheer. rumah ini kosong kini.
rumah bersebelahan ada penghuni tetapi cuma penyewa. seorang wanita sedang menyidai kain di ampaian. dua orang kanak-kanak berlari-lari di keliling.
2000 rose avenue. hakcipta terpelihara oleh tehtamgam
mencari damai
"ammal, pergi meeting pukul 2 nanti di aras 25!" suara bos berlabuh di hujung pendengaranku sebaik sahaja aku duduk di kerusi.
aku baru balik dari mesyuarat di jabatan N. di atas mejaku bertimbun fail dan kepingan kertas.
"ammal mana laporan yang patut siap hari ni?" "ammal apa kemajuan projek di jabatan K?" "ammal ....." "ammal ...."
suara bos terngiang-ngiang di telinga. aku buntu. aku bagai pohon kerdil diasak ribut taufan dari kiri kanan. peluh dingin memercik di dahi. tangan mula rasa lembab.
entah dari mana datangnya kekuatan dan ide. aku tak pasti.
jam di tangan menunjukkan pukul 1 petang. aku perlu keluar sebentar. demi kewarasanku. lalu jari cepat mencapai beg dan kaki menuju lobi lif. pantas sekali.
destinasi tidak ku ketahui; yang pastinya aku terus berjalan. dan berjalan. menyelusuri jalan-jalan sempit kota tanjong. panas matahari bulan julai tidak terasa. yang penting aku mesti mencari damai. tapi di mana?
aku baru balik dari mesyuarat di jabatan N. di atas mejaku bertimbun fail dan kepingan kertas.
"ammal mana laporan yang patut siap hari ni?" "ammal apa kemajuan projek di jabatan K?" "ammal ....." "ammal ...."
suara bos terngiang-ngiang di telinga. aku buntu. aku bagai pohon kerdil diasak ribut taufan dari kiri kanan. peluh dingin memercik di dahi. tangan mula rasa lembab.
entah dari mana datangnya kekuatan dan ide. aku tak pasti.
jam di tangan menunjukkan pukul 1 petang. aku perlu keluar sebentar. demi kewarasanku. lalu jari cepat mencapai beg dan kaki menuju lobi lif. pantas sekali.
destinasi tidak ku ketahui; yang pastinya aku terus berjalan. dan berjalan. menyelusuri jalan-jalan sempit kota tanjong. panas matahari bulan julai tidak terasa. yang penting aku mesti mencari damai. tapi di mana?
first day in school
1964. first day in primary one she wore a full skirted flimsy yellow tea gown and stood out in a class of deep blue box pleated pinafore and white blouse clad little girls. her school uniform was bought on that very day.
during recess her grandpa brought roti canai. she bought a glass of cold syrupy drink sold by the sisters.
her grandpa sent her to the convent school about six miles from their house on his big bicycle. the next week she took the yellow bus each day until an incident when she tried to walk home from school made her grandpa immediately buy a black ford prefect PA3366.
that was the first car in their hillside village. and her grandpa being the headman, it was rather useful.
she tried to walk home after school that day because the bus she normally took was being repaired. another bus assigned to replace it didn't stop when she waved to it as it moved out of the bus station. being 7 years old she didn't stop to think about taking the next bus after another hour.
she started to walk home feeling terribly brave in the hot afternoon sunshine. she walked alone carrying her small black plastic school bag.
after about a mile she saw trouble ahead in the form of a herd of cows walking in her direction!
and she was terrified of cows!
she stopped in her tracks wondering what to do. just then a miracle by the grace of the All Mighty. her brother and a few friends came cycling along from behind her on their way home from secondary school!
from then on she went to school by car. her grandpa took along some other kids too for RM7.00 per month. it was the beginning in the area for some kind of a school bus system.
during recess her grandpa brought roti canai. she bought a glass of cold syrupy drink sold by the sisters.
her grandpa sent her to the convent school about six miles from their house on his big bicycle. the next week she took the yellow bus each day until an incident when she tried to walk home from school made her grandpa immediately buy a black ford prefect PA3366.
that was the first car in their hillside village. and her grandpa being the headman, it was rather useful.
she tried to walk home after school that day because the bus she normally took was being repaired. another bus assigned to replace it didn't stop when she waved to it as it moved out of the bus station. being 7 years old she didn't stop to think about taking the next bus after another hour.
she started to walk home feeling terribly brave in the hot afternoon sunshine. she walked alone carrying her small black plastic school bag.
after about a mile she saw trouble ahead in the form of a herd of cows walking in her direction!
and she was terrified of cows!
she stopped in her tracks wondering what to do. just then a miracle by the grace of the All Mighty. her brother and a few friends came cycling along from behind her on their way home from secondary school!
from then on she went to school by car. her grandpa took along some other kids too for RM7.00 per month. it was the beginning in the area for some kind of a school bus system.
Saturday, 22 September 2012
one dawn at cenang
the beach was desolate. she was alone, sitting on the soft white sand. her eyes were focused on the waves. on infinity.
then she heard voices. she peered through the thinning mist.
a boat, a perahu to be exact. and some people.
but....
why were their clothes so quaint? the men with tanjak on their heads. keris in their sampins. the ladies in kebaya labuh and kain pelikat on their hair.
she got up. to get a better view.
an eagle soared in the heavens with a loud shrill cry. its wings spanned and curved so elegantly.
when she looked again towards the shore..... it was empty......
then she heard voices. she peered through the thinning mist.
a boat, a perahu to be exact. and some people.
but....
why were their clothes so quaint? the men with tanjak on their heads. keris in their sampins. the ladies in kebaya labuh and kain pelikat on their hair.
she got up. to get a better view.
an eagle soared in the heavens with a loud shrill cry. its wings spanned and curved so elegantly.
when she looked again towards the shore..... it was empty......
the most successful public space in the world
how do you explain the beauty of Masjidil Haram? how do you put to words the peace and love felt at the sight of the Baitullah? how do you express the sweetness of the Zam Zam?
how does a mere mortal describe the cool serenity of just being in Mekah Al Mukarramah, while under a blazing sun?
the unending tawaf all day and night, the saie.
and the sight of the faithful in Arafah, flooding the desert plain with overflowing hearts.
Muzdalifah. Mina. the Jamrah.
Madinah Al Munawarrah. Masjid Nabawi. Raudhah.
the Masjidil Haram and the area around it is the most successful public space in the world, used 24 hours a day, 365 days a year by millions.
how does one explain this longing to be there again and again and again.....
how does a mere mortal describe the cool serenity of just being in Mekah Al Mukarramah, while under a blazing sun?
the unending tawaf all day and night, the saie.
and the sight of the faithful in Arafah, flooding the desert plain with overflowing hearts.
Muzdalifah. Mina. the Jamrah.
Madinah Al Munawarrah. Masjid Nabawi. Raudhah.
the Masjidil Haram and the area around it is the most successful public space in the world, used 24 hours a day, 365 days a year by millions.
how does one explain this longing to be there again and again and again.....
a cabbage in the garden
the monsoon is here again, bringing fresh showers and cold cold wind from misty mt jerai.
the garden sparkles and glitters. foliage becomes lush and luxuriant.
then seen peeping shyly from amongst the grass is a tiny cabbage plant!
kiko in wonderland
she'd sit on the rattan chair on the terrace facing the shady garden. kiko would be frolicking amongst the ferns and heliconia. once in a while the grey rabbit would come to her, curled at her feet.
where's the march hare and the mad hatter?
kiko wandering under autumn skies.....
where's the march hare and the mad hatter?
kiko wandering under autumn skies.....
Sunday, 9 September 2012
her grandpa's house
trees surrounded her grandfather's house. on the right there were ciku, jambu, nutmeg, a coconut hybrid (small), rambutan. on the left by a stream were rambutan, durian, jambu, orange, hybrid coconut, machang, mango, star fruit. behind the timber house on stilts were many asam trees, durian belanda, langsat, rambai, durian, manggis, cempedak, nangka, guava, some herbal plants like lemuni, lengkuas.
in front of the house across the village road were more durian trees, machang, rambai, langsat,
coconut trees were everywhere.
during the fruit season men were hired to climb the langsat and rambai trees to gather the lovely fruits which would be sold. the durian tree just next to the house beside the stream was her favourite. the fruits were not big, the durian flesh white but oh so creamy and delicious. this type of durian was called kucing tidur, sometimes there was only 1 ulas in a single compartment of the fruit, luscious and simply wonderful. every morning she would pick up the small rounded fruits.
the spreading rambutan tree on the right side of the house has large, white, sweet fruits which came off easily from the seeds.
the langsat and rambai were also very sweet to the taste, fresh off the trees. the nangka, guava, jambu, orange, ciku (oh so sweet), nutmeg, asam were not seasonal so they were enjoyed all year round. guava is green skinned. jambu is red skinned and soft white inside. the green skinned orange rather big with peach coloured flesh was terribly sweet.
rambutans, manggis from the dusun as well as from around the house were also made into jam, eaten with fresh roti benggali..... oh it was so good! some rambutans from the dusun which did not come off the seeds easily were preserved in salt water. they tasted good too.
asam were tiny rounded fruits red and sweet when ripe, can be eaten fresh on its own or dipped in soya sauce with chillies or preserved in salted water.
there were also papaya plants, tapioca, limau purut, chillies, basil, serai, serai wangi, cekur sometimes brinjals, okra, tomatoes and other vegetables. tapioca shoots were blanched in hot water and eaten as ulam with sambal belacan mixed with shredded machang.... heavenly. during ramadhan, her mum and grandmother would look for many kinds of leaves and shoots on the hillside to make nasi ulam. the lemuni leaves were used to make nasi lemuni, eaten with fish sambal...good for mums in confinement after childnirth.
behind the house was a chicken coop. eggs were collected everyday, fresh and warm. her grandfather reared some ducks too, waddling in the shallow stream.
there were flower plants like the bakawali with big white fragrant flowers, red and pink roses, red, orange and even blue hibiscus, purple orchids, red pagoda flowers, peach amaryllis, bougainvillea, fragrant tiny white melati, long dangling red ekor kucing, yellow marigolds, yellow, red crotons, yellow allamanda, maroon acalypha, tiny althenanthera rows and a hegde called daun teh.
she used to have a small patch of garden. in the evenings after studying and doing school work, she would grab a small cangkul and tended to the tapioca, sweet potato, kacang botol and other plants there. it was her very wise grandfather's idea for her to have a vegetable garden of her own. the kacang botol was so luxuriant that she gave some to neighbours.
ah.... what a haven!
in front of the house across the village road were more durian trees, machang, rambai, langsat,
coconut trees were everywhere.
during the fruit season men were hired to climb the langsat and rambai trees to gather the lovely fruits which would be sold. the durian tree just next to the house beside the stream was her favourite. the fruits were not big, the durian flesh white but oh so creamy and delicious. this type of durian was called kucing tidur, sometimes there was only 1 ulas in a single compartment of the fruit, luscious and simply wonderful. every morning she would pick up the small rounded fruits.
the spreading rambutan tree on the right side of the house has large, white, sweet fruits which came off easily from the seeds.
the langsat and rambai were also very sweet to the taste, fresh off the trees. the nangka, guava, jambu, orange, ciku (oh so sweet), nutmeg, asam were not seasonal so they were enjoyed all year round. guava is green skinned. jambu is red skinned and soft white inside. the green skinned orange rather big with peach coloured flesh was terribly sweet.
rambutans, manggis from the dusun as well as from around the house were also made into jam, eaten with fresh roti benggali..... oh it was so good! some rambutans from the dusun which did not come off the seeds easily were preserved in salt water. they tasted good too.
asam were tiny rounded fruits red and sweet when ripe, can be eaten fresh on its own or dipped in soya sauce with chillies or preserved in salted water.
there were also papaya plants, tapioca, limau purut, chillies, basil, serai, serai wangi, cekur sometimes brinjals, okra, tomatoes and other vegetables. tapioca shoots were blanched in hot water and eaten as ulam with sambal belacan mixed with shredded machang.... heavenly. during ramadhan, her mum and grandmother would look for many kinds of leaves and shoots on the hillside to make nasi ulam. the lemuni leaves were used to make nasi lemuni, eaten with fish sambal...good for mums in confinement after childnirth.
behind the house was a chicken coop. eggs were collected everyday, fresh and warm. her grandfather reared some ducks too, waddling in the shallow stream.
there were flower plants like the bakawali with big white fragrant flowers, red and pink roses, red, orange and even blue hibiscus, purple orchids, red pagoda flowers, peach amaryllis, bougainvillea, fragrant tiny white melati, long dangling red ekor kucing, yellow marigolds, yellow, red crotons, yellow allamanda, maroon acalypha, tiny althenanthera rows and a hegde called daun teh.
she used to have a small patch of garden. in the evenings after studying and doing school work, she would grab a small cangkul and tended to the tapioca, sweet potato, kacang botol and other plants there. it was her very wise grandfather's idea for her to have a vegetable garden of her own. the kacang botol was so luxuriant that she gave some to neighbours.
ah.... what a haven!
saturday in the park
after brisk walking at the park she was at the work-out station next to a huge enclosure with deers and birds.
then she saw a forlorn looking deer at the fencing, staring right at her!
it must be asking for something. so she quickly picked up a few green tender leaves, went up to the deer and fed it through the fence.it quickly gobbled up the leaves. she picked up some more. soon there were two other deers also waiting for her!
it was a beautiful moment.
then she saw a forlorn looking deer at the fencing, staring right at her!
it must be asking for something. so she quickly picked up a few green tender leaves, went up to the deer and fed it through the fence.it quickly gobbled up the leaves. she picked up some more. soon there were two other deers also waiting for her!
it was a beautiful moment.
faery rings and toadstools
in her primary school days she would imagine having a tiny fairy, with wings of course, as a friend. in her dream world the fairies would dance with her on moonlit nights in a fairy ring. red topped toadstools would be houses with doors for elves, brownies, pixies and the like.
she would also have a magic wand so that she can have everything she wanted, lots of cakes and chocolates to eat, pretty clothes, a magic bicycle that can fly.....
in school she'd be looking for fairy rings in the green grassy field. sometimes she'd find one, a circle of dark green grass....
she still loves the book "the magic faraway tree" by enid blyton. and shakespeare's "a midsummer night's dream" ....
she would also have a magic wand so that she can have everything she wanted, lots of cakes and chocolates to eat, pretty clothes, a magic bicycle that can fly.....
in school she'd be looking for fairy rings in the green grassy field. sometimes she'd find one, a circle of dark green grass....
she still loves the book "the magic faraway tree" by enid blyton. and shakespeare's "a midsummer night's dream" ....
Friday, 7 September 2012
perfume making
she was in primary three and adventurous. gathering some rose blooms from the garden she set out to make her own perfume.
she washed an empty ink bottle. then she plucked out the red rose petals and placed them in the bottle filled with water.
after a few days she took a sniff at the concoction. it smelled faintly of roses but it was not perfume!
she washed an empty ink bottle. then she plucked out the red rose petals and placed them in the bottle filled with water.
after a few days she took a sniff at the concoction. it smelled faintly of roses but it was not perfume!
recess time in primary school
in primary school she spent recess time at the edge of the field under some spreading trees. she and a close friend would sit on the green grass each with a plastic container of rice brought from home. hers would also have plump squids and onions fried with turmeric. so so delicious.
then they played on the swings or see saw. or played a game kicking some frangipani flowers tied in a clump with rubber bands.
sometimes more friends and classmates joined in a game of catch.
her favourite snack at the school canteen was reddish dried cuttlefish packed in a roll of paper sold at 10 sen each. chocolate ice cream on a stick cost 10 sen too.
sometimes she bought nasi lemak sold by a classmate behind the standard four classroom. the sambal ikan bilis was thick and really yummy. but after a time the school found out about this and stopped the girl from selling the nasi lemak.
then they played on the swings or see saw. or played a game kicking some frangipani flowers tied in a clump with rubber bands.
sometimes more friends and classmates joined in a game of catch.
her favourite snack at the school canteen was reddish dried cuttlefish packed in a roll of paper sold at 10 sen each. chocolate ice cream on a stick cost 10 sen too.
sometimes she bought nasi lemak sold by a classmate behind the standard four classroom. the sambal ikan bilis was thick and really yummy. but after a time the school found out about this and stopped the girl from selling the nasi lemak.
a cloudy day
her bedroom's balcony faces mount jerai which is hidden by swirls of thick grey cloud. the air is crisp and cold. and fragrant. rain is imminent.
dewdrops are lingering on grass, ferns and leaves. they sparkle like a million diamonds. the deep pink flowers of the cape myrtle stands out among the white jasmine blooms. a butterfly flits softly from blossom to blossom.
there is so much beauty all around, even on a cloudy day!
dewdrops are lingering on grass, ferns and leaves. they sparkle like a million diamonds. the deep pink flowers of the cape myrtle stands out among the white jasmine blooms. a butterfly flits softly from blossom to blossom.
there is so much beauty all around, even on a cloudy day!
Thursday, 6 September 2012
elocution contest
it all started in secondary one. she actually only half understood what she was supposed to do. the speech, in english, was written for her by a third former. she had only to memorise it and spoke aloud in front of the mirror everyday in preparation, minding her words, grammar, her facial expressions and hand gestures.
the other contestants from other schools in the district were fifth formers. so there she was, a rather chubby self-conscious first former, first time on the stage!
but she won first place, much to her own amazement! it made her grandfather so proud even though the prize was only a geometry set!
that started it all. she went on to win more prizes for english and malay elocution, debates etc.
the other contestants from other schools in the district were fifth formers. so there she was, a rather chubby self-conscious first former, first time on the stage!
but she won first place, much to her own amazement! it made her grandfather so proud even though the prize was only a geometry set!
that started it all. she went on to win more prizes for english and malay elocution, debates etc.
non-athlete
in primary one, she was in yellow house. on sports day she won third place for the duck walking event. so she did not win any prizes.
in standard two she was a dancer during sports day. she wore a deep green pleated skirt and sleeveless pale green blouse and off white shoes, all bought at a shop in tanjong with the first escalator on the island. she was among four dancers in the middle of the field, dancing to the tune of 'sing a song of sixpence'.
she played netball, hockey, badminton, tennis. she did high jump, long jump, the hurdles. she finished the 1 km walk, the 100 m sprint. she even did gymnastics.
but she never represented her school in any games.
in standard two she was a dancer during sports day. she wore a deep green pleated skirt and sleeveless pale green blouse and off white shoes, all bought at a shop in tanjong with the first escalator on the island. she was among four dancers in the middle of the field, dancing to the tune of 'sing a song of sixpence'.
she played netball, hockey, badminton, tennis. she did high jump, long jump, the hurdles. she finished the 1 km walk, the 100 m sprint. she even did gymnastics.
but she never represented her school in any games.
bouquet girl
in primary school, she was always the girl who gave bouquets of flowers to the honorary guests during school sports days and other functions. once, a personality from paris came a visiting to her school. she again presented a bouquet.
during annual sports days, the guest of honour was usually the district officer's wife.
once in standard 5, she was told to dress neatly in a new school uniform for sports day, the deep blue pinafore with box pleats, a belt and white blouse, all starched and ironed with a charcoal iron by her grandmother.
somehow she forgot about the bouquet presentation and went to school in an old uniform. or perhaps at that time of year she did not have a brand new pair! the sisters grumblingly took charge, lent her a presentable pinafore and blouse, combed her hair, added a blue hair band. they even had to find a brilliant white pair of shoes and socks for her.
she heard a teacher asking the sisters to just get another girl to present the bouquet. the sisters said no. she didn't hear the reason given.
sometimes she wondered why too!
during annual sports days, the guest of honour was usually the district officer's wife.
once in standard 5, she was told to dress neatly in a new school uniform for sports day, the deep blue pinafore with box pleats, a belt and white blouse, all starched and ironed with a charcoal iron by her grandmother.
somehow she forgot about the bouquet presentation and went to school in an old uniform. or perhaps at that time of year she did not have a brand new pair! the sisters grumblingly took charge, lent her a presentable pinafore and blouse, combed her hair, added a blue hair band. they even had to find a brilliant white pair of shoes and socks for her.
she heard a teacher asking the sisters to just get another girl to present the bouquet. the sisters said no. she didn't hear the reason given.
sometimes she wondered why too!
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